HOW DO WE WRITE LOVE LETTERS TO THOSE BEING HATEFUL?
I am working on a loving response to someone who has been coming to our church virtually. Almost every week this poor man has sent emails of complaint. He believes our justice stands are “virtue signaling” and our attempts to understand other cultures are examples of “wokeness.”
I have wasted WAY too much time and energy trying to communicate with someone who clearly isn’t even trying to hear another point of view. I know it’s foolish, but there’s something deep in my soul that cannot finally give up on any human being.
It is very hard to communicate with those who speak in cliches. When people spit out jargon words like “woke” for the forbidden world outside their own prejudices, and “virtue signaling” for any benevolence outside their own narrow frame of concern, it becomes clear these poor propagandized people are not actually trying to think at all. They are simply using hypnotic trigger words to protect themselves FROM new ideas that would break their trance.
I’m all for diverse opinions, but racism, sexism and classism are not just opinions, they are justifications for oppression. The problem is, in their entranced state, these poor frightened people imagine themselves brave for collectively bullying the populations targeted for oppression by this culture.
I don’t know how to be honest AND loving. When I’m angry what I WANT to say is:
Here’s something you don’t seem to know about me- I’m not you.
I am an autonomous agent outside your every context. I’m not on earth to win your approval. I feel no motivation to justify myself to you. In fact, until you can learn to step outside your own context and test your ideas by some objective standard, I might as well be trying to communicate with a pre-recorded message.
I love you as a human being, but I also love the people toward which you are being hateful. If they attack you unfairly, count on me being on your side. Just know, if you attack them unfairly, you can damn well count on my being on theirs.